Kids laugh 400 times a day, and their relationships are simple.

But as kids age, their sense of humor can get lost. Research shows that adults laugh only 15 times a day.

"And we all know how complex our relationships get," said Alice O'Connor, who led a workshop on how to improve relationships.

Her inspirational seminar at the union's statewide conference for paraprofessionals and school staff encouraged people to first know thyself.

"If you're determined, practical and you like to meet deadlines, you may also expect others to be right on time and right on deadline," O'Connor said. "That clashes with the type of person who is supportive and trained to respond to people and situations, where 'on time' doesn't have real meaning when a child is crying in the office or the computer needs to be fixed."

O'Connor emphasized that all qualities are valuable assets.

Once people have determined their personal styles, they can start to identify ways to solve relationship problems with colleagues or supervisors.

Ways to solve problems include:

• Focus on your own strength and unique qualities;

• Understand what you need in relationships. Do you want freedom, or do you want familiar schedules and routines?